


Seem to Shatter by Arsenic

by Arsenic



Category: Bandom, My Chemical Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-07-07
Updated: 2007-07-07
Packaged: 2020-10-26 03:16:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20735351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arsenic/pseuds/Arsenic
Summary: Brian forgives Gerard.





	Seem to Shatter by Arsenic

**Author's Note:**

> Written for annavtree in the Rare Pairings Meme. Takes place before the first show Gerard plays after rehabbing.

Gerard said, "Hi," then, "I'm sorry," then, "hi," again, because he wasn't sure which was the more appropriate or needed to be said more, or anything, really, at this point.

Brian kissed him and rubbed gently at the back of his neck. "How're you feeling?"

_Please don't be nice to me._ "Okay. Better." _Terrified._ "Maybe we should postpone. Reschedule a few of these, y'know? Just until, I mean, we still kinda could get used to Bob and we don't even know--"

"Gee." Brian shook his head. "These people are coming for a show. And you're gonna give it to them."

"Bri--"

"You can do it. No problem. You can--"

"Could you stop fucking having so much fucking faith in me?" Gerard was shaking from fear, fear of the show, of disappointing Brian, failing him in his faith, fear of Brian giving up, like he should have so long ago. Like he should have the night he said, "Think you've had enough?" and Gerard said, "You're not my fucking mother."

Brian looked at him for a few minutes and then said, "No," softly. "I really... Don't you think I would if I could?"

Probably. Brian was a smart guy. Gerard felt a sob eat at his throat but he swallowed it down. "Bri."

"You're clean, Gee. You're fucking _clean_. And you did it pretty much by yourself."

"I called you."

"Yeah, you called me. And we talked. And then you stuck yourself in a room and sweated and puked and cried that shit out because you knew it was what you had to do. You want me not to have faith in you? Are you serious? What the fuck should I have faith in, Gee?"

"I'm shaky on this notion, but some people like G-d."

Brian laughed. It was a weak laugh, but it was real. "You guys are doing the show."

"And if we fuck it up?"

"There's a show scheduled for two days from now, which I think you know."

"And if--"

"It was never the drugs performing, just like it was never the alcohol that I loved. That was...it was always despite that, Gee. Everything was always despite that. And you're gonna know that, you're gonna see now that you can see, you're gonna see so fucking clearly."

Gerard pressed his lips to the spot right by Brian's ear. "I see you. I'm sorry I didn't, for a little bit, there. I--that was part of why I had to stop, I swear. I always want to see you."

"I know." Brian's voice was thick. "I always do see you."

"Your version of me."

"You."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you."

"Forgiven."


End file.
